Me dealing with my parents divorcing (Just me talking)

Hey there !

I wanted to talk about something that is happening to me those times. Yey you probably don't care and I asume, I'm not doing it for you even if some will recognise but for me because I need to talk.

Well, I'm 19 and my parents are getting a divorce. Just to locate, my mother left my father. I knew it for a long time and now my father is upset against me.

Now everytime I'm calling him it's just or he is saying bad things about my mom or he is just forgeting things we already said and I got to repeat several times the sames things even if it is about him, it is the same if it is about him...

I'm leaving far away and I'm just feeling so bad not to call him a lot. And when I call him, I'm just feeling so bad after. My father is feeling so lonely and so bad. I don't know how to say it, it hurts me. I've got a lot to do with school those times, but if I don't have anything to say, he is upset and he is thinking that I'm don't want to talk to him.

The thing is also that I'm leaving for two month in april in Senegal and I'm just frightened that something happened to him or anything.

He is depressed, like truly but don't want to recognize it. My grandma (his mother) is worried for him too and it is just getting me be more scared

I probably look silly there but I needed to write it and I don't find anywhere people talking about how as “adult”. I don't think anyone would ever read or anser it but it just feel good and I'm pretty sure that you'll see over articles of that type here !

Xoxo, Hélène